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Widowed partners

Created on 06 Feb 2010 by Niki.
11 members.

About this group

This group is for partners who have lost their beloved one in a Road Accident, to share experiences and personal stages of grief

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Latest news

Learning to love once again

Published: 19 Feb 2010

I wanted to share my experience of being a young widow.......

Just when you think you had it all, some irresponsible driver comes and takes it all away in a flash, I was lucky to have had one child to the love of my life, but that was all it was going to be, no second sibling, no wedding, all future plans erased. I always knew I was going to settle down later in life and at the age of 35 I was pregnant with our daughter, yes unplanned, however after all the hours of talk and contimplation on a new life of 3 and not just 2 anymore, the responsibility was made and decided that love is much bigger than just 2 people, and I will never forget the day we decided to keep our beautiful little girl, as our lives were changed forever on that day for the better, even if just for a few years. Lee was 6 years younger than me, he had captured me with his maturity, his wicked sense of humour and most of all his compassion for others. I felt like a princess every day, his princess. Every day I would eagerly await his return home knowing he enjoyed coming home, as he told me so often. Lee would always tell me " you make coming home, a safe place to be". Even if either of us were just going out for 5 minutes around to the corner shop, Lee taught me to allways kiss and say I love you, just incase it is the last thing we ever say to each other. How was I to know he was so right, the last thing Lee did was kiss me and say " catch you later honey, love you" as he rode out of our driveway.

I know in my heart Lee would want me to love again, and our daughter share the simular joy we all had together, somedays these shoes are just to difficult to fill, other days I am open to change, but overall it is going to be difficult. I will hang onto the faith it will happen again because it had already by fate.... unexpectedly happened once before.

In loving memory of my LuvLee

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Jennifer Gibson | 24 Feb 2010

On my 40th birthday, a florist shop rang saying I had to pick up some flowers. There was a beautiful card with the flowers that directed me to the next shop. I went to 5 shops. Each shop directed me on to another shop. At the end was Dennis. He was so romantic, so caring, so thoughtful. He organised so many incredible trips, weekends, presents.
He was only 54 when he died. He had survived open heart surgery. The surgeon had said he would have another 20 years. He and I have been robbed of our future.

Dennis called me dream boat, we never in the 25 years went to sleep with angry words hanging.

In loving memory of Dennis xoxo

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Niki | 24 Feb 2010

Hi Jennifer,

Thank you for sharing your words with us,what a wonderful father your Dennis is, caring and compasionate I cannot image your flower journey, however I am so happy to know you have had an individual journey which is yours alone to experience and keep in your heart forever. Yes life has robbed you too of future dreams. I am so sorry to hear of your loss. Please call back here again soon.

My Kindest Regards,

Nicola

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Jennifer Gibson | 02 Mar 2010

Hi Nicola,

Thank you for your kind words. I feel I have been let down by the legal system but what else is new. I feel Den’s death doesn’t count and they look after the drive if they are not drunk of stoned. I went to court case today.

Jenny

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rosie | 25 Mar 2010

I LOST MY SON NOV A MAN WHO LEFT 7 CHILDREN
BEHIND A HARD 43 WORKING YR OLD MAN .I DID NOT SEE HIM FOR MANY YRS HE WAS IN WA BORN XMAS EVE HE WAS MY FIRST BORN THE SADNESS TO ME WAS I DID NOT NO HE WAS DEAD TILL 6TH DEC . I WAS NOT TOLD .
HARD TO TAKE LOTS STILL GOING ON I AM HERE THATS BIG STEP MAGGIE SO SAD TO READ YOUR LIFE SADNESS

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amanda soutar | 07 Apr 2010

I too lost the most beautiful man just over 12 months ago. He was killed on his motorbike just before the birth of our little daughter. I can honestly say that I do understand the feeling when you are so deeply happy and grateful to have met a wonderful partner. Sending you much love. There are days when I know that half of me is whereever he is.

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Erin Pastore | 30 Nov 2012

In July 2009 I lost my partner Sam, but it wasn’t an accident – he committed suicide. He took his seat belt off when he was in the car, drove into a tree and then got out of the car and lay across the road until another car hit and killed him. I still feel incredibly guilty about everything that happened because it was after an argument and I had threatened to break up with him. I also feel very guilty about what the girl who hit him must be going through…if I could take her pain away I would.
There is hope though. When I was sure I would never be able to love again I met the man who is now my husband, father to our 7 month old son and step father to my 7 year old son. He is the most loving, caring and understanding man I have ever met and I feel so blessed to have him in my life…I can’t begin to explain how much I love him.
Even when it feels like your heart has been ripped apart and can never be made whole again, have faith. Don’t allow the expectation of loss to rule your life. Instead, live life with the knowledge that love could be right around the corner.
Much love to all of you.


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